You may have noticed the name of my blog.
A Soul is a Resilient Thing.
I honestly believe that to be true.
In my heart of hearts, I believe that a soul is a resilient thing.
Living with chronic illness leaves a lot to be desired some days. Especially when you live with multiple chronic illnesses. And they decide to kick off all at once.
Moments like that are a sharp reminder of the fragile nature of our physical form. And they can challenge you to levels you may not even be aware of. Though I think really, we are.
There are days my body feels as though it may collapse under the weight of all it entails to keep it going, like those extra 180 decisions those of us living with type 1 diabetes make each day. As if the burden of keeping oneself alive was not enough.
And then there are the days my mental illnesses threaten to get the better of me. It can be a struggle to explain how those mental hurdles negatively impact my physical body.
It is hard not to be reminded of what it takes when your days are filled with handfuls of pills and medications, site/port changes, appointments, blood draws and urine tests, monitoring of all sorts…
For a good long time, I convinced myself that I all I am/was could be wrapped up in this form. That shape and the space I took up somehow summarized me. And not just for a moment, but forever.
Until I decided that it did not.
Because fuck that heaping pile of garbage. Right!? All bullshit and positivity aside, life in a body existing with chronic illness FUCKING SUCKS sometimes.
And I do not think people say that enough.
My body may not be resilient but I am.
And the only proof needed is the fact that I show up every day.
I do not think that gets said enough either.
Bookmark this, save the graphic, print this page. Do whatever you need to keep this message available for those days you need it.
Because you will require the gentle reminder that you are a fucking wonder.
And that is okay.