Forum Policy

I type this hurriedly. I type this without much pre-thought. I type this with a degree of displeasure. And so, I apologize for its brief and somewhat scattered nature.

*** *** ***

I am a Type 1 Diabetic. I have never met another Type 1 in the flesh. I have never spoken to or had the support of someone like me. I have never been to a support group. A camp. Nothing. I was diagnosed. Given a quick education. Handed an insulin pen. Pushed back out into the world. Oh, how I wish it had been a bit different. But. Without those parts of my journey I would not be here. So. I have no regrets.

The Internet offers a lot. It is a dangerous web. Step lightly! Not only can you Google things, you can buy/sell on the Internet, go to school, and earn a living…and a whole host of other things. The Internet also has forums. Places to go, seek advice. Communicate with others. There are lose rules that some administrator employs now and then.

I joined a big diabetes group once. I left more than a year ago (and have posted about it previously). My experience there was not positive. I try to be upbeat and keep a positive attitude about more than just my diabetes, but was not prepared for the backlash that ensued following my post there about trying have a good outlook. I could not believe how much negativity came from that wee bit of positivity. I swore I would never go back. And I haven’t. I still receive their email updates. I believe I still have a page there. But I left. People were mean. Cruel. Unnecessarily so. And no one respected the fact that it was my opinion. They were more than happy to exercise their right to one while dismissing mine.

A few days ago I joined a Facebook group. It is called I Hate Diabetes (Type 1). I was apprehensive to join. But I often feel so alone with my diabetes. And I didn’t want to anymore. I wanted comradery. I wasn’t looking for friends. Just people to shoot the diabetes shit with; people who would understand my perspective. Because they wear similar shoes.

About 48-hours in, I had second thoughts. I got the feeling this wasn’t going to be the right group for me. After some searching, reading of posts, I thought maybe I was being silly. It was a group of diabetics just like me (by that I mean Type 1), not out to hurt feelings or be careless or offensive. It turns out I was wrong. WAY wrong.

Today I left that group too.

Before you go…

There is a coffee shop in New South Wales. They have a new secret menu. They put a post on their Facebook page (The Paramount Coffee Project) about a new item on said menu. It is riddled with sugar and sweet and gluttony. It appears to be the perfect indulgence, if you are inclined that way. Just a regular overly sugary dessert. Except it is offensive. That dessert is cruelly sweet. The store has told its Facebook following patrons to come in and ask for it by name: DIABETES.

Diabetes is the name of the above dessert.
Oh, and the disease I have that requires me to prick my finger
countless times a day and inject insulin via a syringe
a minimum of 4-5 times a day.

A gal who belonged to the group posted the link to this coffee shop and their dessert. Many people shared their opinions. I did. (I also went to the page and left comments there, in the form of a review.) I expressed my disgust for such a distasteful marketing strategy. And then it started…

I was told to suck it up. I was told to get a sense of humour. I was told it was only a joke.

Oh, so diabetes is a joke? Where are all of the cancer memes? I bet those wouldn’t go over so well. (Inner thoughts, sorry.)

I generally have a pretty good sense of humour regarding all facets of my life. And that includes diabetes. But this kind of menu item, this kind of poking fun, is insulting. It is perpetuating ignorance and stereotypes.

A final goodbye…

I will not be rejoining that group. I am not sure that I will join another forum. I cannot be a part of something that inevitably leads to negativity.

And I think that is sad. Because I am deserving of support. Especially from fellow diabetics.

I guess I will have to find it somewhere else.

7 thoughts on “Forum Policy

  1. I’m sorry you haven’t had any luck with forums. There ARE positive people in the world…I just feel like the internet isn’t the best place to find them (besides the blogging world). Okay, fine – there are a lot of negative people who blog too. 😛

    The dessert being called diabetes reminds me of people calling the weather (or people) bipolar. I don’t get bent out of shape about it, but it does offend me when people use bipolar as an adjective. “It is perpetuating ignorance and stereotypes.” Exactly.

    • Awe thanks. It’s no big deal. Really. I think I’ve discovered the forum thing ain’t my thang! 😉 And I’m okay with that. I enjoy the blogs. More thoughtful a space.
      It really isn’t that the word diabetes is used to name the dessert that bothers me (though I strongly agree with you, the adjective role is offensive). It’s the implication.
      Cheers for stopping by! 🙂

  2. Really interesting post, as much for what you left unsaid as for what you said. Agree with you about the name of that dessert. And had never thought about “bipolar” thing ’til Kylie brought it up, but that is the same thing, isn’t it?

    I was diagnosed as diabetic the summer before college–sleeping 16 hrs. a day…my gluc. tol. test over 600. “They” told me I’d have to skip the oral drugs and start insulin shots right away. My mom got me a book “The Peripatetic Diabetic”, to reassure me that I could have a normal life. When I got to the author backing herself in a corner to force the abdominal injections, I said “F#ck THIS!”. I told “THEM” I could control with diet alone, refused insulin, stuck to the strick diet–I starved constantly, but it worked. Of course only because I wasn’t permanently diabetic. Just temporarily from my autoimmune diseases. (Was able to go off the diet, but I have stayed away almost entirely from fast sugars since.)

    I got the tiniest, teensiest taste of your life. And I run into folks with lupus (and CFS) who…well, you’re nicer than I am–I’m just gonna say it: Wallow in their symptoms. I am the healthiest person I know or know of who has lupus, and maybe it’s ’cause I force myself not to eat sh#t, and force myself to move my #ss when I feel like sh#t. Not saying I don’t like to gripe sometimes, but not frequently or at length–who does THAT help?

    Curious–not my business at all, but if you feel like answering, of course: Why not the pump?

    • Thanks for stopping by ☺ – we all have baggage and we all carry those bags differently. I guess. Kudos to you. I can never sit idle…must keep moving…

      Ah. The pump. Lol. Everyone asks me this – the answer is complicated. In quick, it’s not for me. I cannot fathom the attachment. The constant part of it all. Plus, they hit mainstream when I was diagnosed. A lot of people had serious (and fatal issues) and that stayed with me, I think.

  3. Thank you for answering my intrusive question.

    Looking over my lupus rant: Holy cripes! First of all, “strick”? for “strict”? Never knew my het-up off-the-cuff subconscious was such a p#ss-poor speller.

    But more seriously, it sounded like I was boasting, looking for those kudos, as well as saying that all lupies iller than I have themselves to blame. Did not mean that and don’t think it. Was just Aspie-ing out, going entirely ’round the block to make a simple point: “I get what you mean.”

    Will stop at that, in case when trying to explain further I find a way to put the other foot in my mouth while butchering the spelling of yet another straightforwerd werd 😉

    • Lol. I didn’t find the question intrusive. I appreciate any dialogue about diabetes (however, I must admit I grow tired of all the ignorant “but you’re not fat and/or old” comments). And, being a practical person of sorts, the question made sense. Why not try a device designed to improve my quality of life?

      And I didn’t think the kudos was sought after. I too get what you mean. 😉

      No need to stop. I am grateful for the dialogue. Regardless of speĺling! ☺

  4. Pingback: BY THE POWER OF POD – Dead Pancreas Anxiety

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